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#853
<Harmadillo> I pretty much only read XKCD, Questionable Content and Psychology Today now.
<AceMcStud> questionable content?
<AceMcStud> wow
<AceMcStud> I don't like to overuse "gay"
<AceMcStud> but shit jared
<AceMcStud> that's like, gayer than sucking a dick, that's like putting on lipstip to kiss a dick gently and write it love letters

#852
<AceMcStud> one of these days I'm going to open all of the bookmarks in my "cool wikipedia articles" folder at once
<AceMcStud> I won't be seen until several months later looking like alan moore when I try to make it to wal-mart for canned beans and bleach
<@AceMcStud> then I collapse on my porch because all non-masturbating-related muscles will have atrophied

#851
< kampf> RIP Mr. Kung Fu
<@stderr-> Bruce Lee's ghost killed 'im.
< kampf> epic battle
< com4> bruce lee is getting sloppy
< com4> you know, wrapping a cord around his neck and genitals
< kampf> not sloppy
< kampf> kinky
< com4> true

#850
<@AceMcStud> you can share the dominos pizza delivery progress indicator bar on facebook now
<@AceMcStud> the future is fucking awesome

#849
<stderr> faux semen? Really? that's the subject I come to first thing in the morning?
<tierra> well, we were talking about Grand Central, AceMcStud's job, web design before that... logically speaking, fake semen was next

#848
<@cycokilr> tierra: can you remove your pants pls
<@tierra> eco might have a problem with that
<@eco> No, no. Go right ahead.
-!- eco has left #ut2600

#847
<stderr> damn I need to get back in a relationship stat, these cup o' noodles just ain't doing the job
<eco> I don't think you are supposed to fuck the cup...
<eco> I think it's for nourishment.

#846
<@gibbawho> i love the phrase 'get with the program'
<@gibbawho> few phrases are so back-handedly condescending while staying within the bounds of professionalism.
<@acemcstud> hey
<@acemcstud> that's right!
<@acemcstud> I'm going to start using that more often
<@eco> You aren't using it already?
<@eco> Get with the program.

#845
< influx> Also, I has iPhone now; my transition to full-fledged faggot is complete.
< ManicV> i didn't know you were still transitioning

#844
<shad-o> holy christ
* shad-o throws phone
<GIJoe> :|
<proto_> NOOOOOO
<proto_> HOW WILL YOU CALL JESUS!?

#843
<@tendency> i once NYC compared to an abusive boyfriend with a huge cock. Sure, you're confused, broke, and in shitty situations sometimes, but when it's good it's AMAZING and he's ruined you for anybody else.

#842
<@kampf> so I'm in a city with a bunch of negroes
<@kampf> guess that it's gonna be a riot, either way the election goes
<@kampf> so maybe I'll get a bottle of Hennesey and watch the city burn from my room

#841
manda: i just got delivered two beers
veruus: oh?
manda: yup
manda: and they are both open....so i HAVE to drink them both
veruus: haha
veruus: better hurry
veruus: you have to drive soon

#840
<stderr> Do or do not. There is no try (when it comes to eco's balls).
< Flux|w> Man, tell me about it.

#839
<Flux|w> General question: would you guys fuck a girl in her third trimester?
<stderr> Anally.
<eco> Absolutely not.
<stderr> and if the baby isn't mine, vaginally.
<Flux|w> heh
<Flux|w> why not?
<eco> I wait until they are at least 18 years old first.

#837
<eco> Next time I see someone wearing a Che shirt I want to stop them and say, "A Che shirt? I hope you brought enough for the rest of us."

#836
<gruffy> I want the bacon alarm clock
<noid> bacon alarm clock?
<veruus> your woman makes bacon and it wakes you up
<noid> oh if thats the case, i want the blowjob alarm clock

#835
<@eco> Choose your category.
< science> I'll take Homosexual Innuendos for 500, Alex.
<@eco> *dyew doo dyew doo dyew doo* We have our first Daily Double.
<@eco> What's your wager?
< science> I'll... I'll bet it all Alex.
<@eco> Ok. Frequently uttered at bars, this pickup line often follows this form: "Allow me to push your _____ in."
< science> Ummm...
<@eco> 5 seconds.
< science> What is fudge, Alex?
<@eco> *bzzt* Oooo, so close.
< science> SHIT!
<@eco> "stool" was the correct answer.

#834
< ManicV> i know this sounds gay, but... what should i get embroidered on my chuck taylors?
< ManicV> 12 character limit
< proto> GAY
< ManicV> thx
< ManicV> i'll post pics when i get them

#833
<@Qawee> i thought kampf was a bot

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